Kreef Hotel Security Training Handbook - 1st Edition

a Sneak view into the life & times of the rock festival herbergier crew Kreef Hotel takes immense pride in having trained & developed an experienced and sensitive team of security personnel. These special people have perfected the intricate art of selecting by method of eye-inspection who should and should not be entering at the entrance to the Kreef Hotel. Seen LEFT is an exerpt from one of the training manuals that are studied, disected & committed to memory by our grand team of security specialists.. (these subjects were found to be accredited to enter, but were nevertheless asked to circumvent the foodstall area, as their presence was connected to a sudden lull in food sales. Intricate stuff, this security business. But don't you worry about it, we've got it covered. On closer inspection of the picture left, it seems possible that the short oke's expression of disgust could be caused by the thin oke's protruding (and framed in red) penal area - which, the casual observer will have noticed, sits right smack bang at the same level of the said short oke's said expression of disgust.. It was reported that the thin oke died only weeks after this photograph was taken. Turns out he sufferred from a rare mutation, where the skin becomes too little for the size of the back of the patient. For want of not wanting to scare you with hoypeloy medical terms, suffice to say that the poor fellow's back-skin became so shortened that, each time he blinked his eyes, his penis-skin turned up as a result of the eye-lid stretching the already stretched shortened back-skin.. He was caught in a mid-August sand storm on Langebaan beach. Cause of death was that he masturbated himself into a coma. So it goes in the life of Rock 'n Roll.. Chris Kreef